Temptation rarely has a truly positive implication. Even the definition implies something of a moral wrong that is luring us into action. The question is, if you your definition of “morally wrong” differs from others, is temptation still a negative occurrence?
There are many things that we do and are exposed to every day that would have once been seen as absolute moral depravity. I don’t think anyone needs examples. Most would agree that our modern morals have shifted to meet modern society where it is. This moral flexibility has many benefits, and truthfully, it is necessary for the level of individuality we have all come to demand. However, in that model, what place is there for something like temptation?
Temptation in a free and individualistic society takes on a different role. This role is exploited by marketing, public narrative, and psycho-analysis. The role is one of self-advocation.
Most of the things that we would be tempted by are not seen as morally wrong. At the least, they are legally and socially accepted. Tempted to cheat on your diet, your budget, or your partner? Lots of people do that, and there are probably plenty of good reasons you could come up with to do so. Tempted to be dishonest or act with a little less integrity than you know is right? That other someone probably deserved it and threw the first blow. Maybe you are tempted to be selfish or exploitative? That is just how you get ahead these days. You have to look out for yourself. It is really easy to pass of bad behavior as simple self-interest. When you frame it that way, temptation is normal and maybe even preferred.
I wrote an article a while back called “I’m Sorry, Your Ex Is Not a Narcissist” where I talk more about most behavior that is seen as narcissism could easily be seen as healthy self interest, unless you are trying to get something from them. This follows the same model.
I have struggled a good deal with the concept of what is right and wrong. Lots of people are doing some pretty bad things and tend to get ahead. Worse, no one seems to think they are that bad. If everyone accepts bad behavior, is it really bad? If this bad behavior really is helping people get ahead, maybe it is the new “good.” That is really tempting.
I think we are in the midst of a moral frontier. Unexplored territory where the old rules don’t have to apply. Therefore, everyone plays by their own sets of rules and we are playing ethical offence and defense constantly, just trying to maintain our soul. This puts a lot of responsibility on us as individuals to sort this question out for ourselves in a way that enables us to interact with the world positively and hope we don’t go crazy.
This is not an easy question. Taken too far, it can be personally problematic. If everyone filed bankruptcy, is that better or worse for the world (about 10% of Americans will file for bankruptcy in their lifetime)? If everyone cheated on their spouse, is that a good thing (20–25% of married people do)? Divorce (about 40% of marriages end in divorce)? Shoplifting (about 40% of consumers have)? Hate and discrimination of entire groups (Most people, but it’s on the rise)? The list goes on. Clearly the old question “if your friends all jumped off a bridge, would you” is no longer valid. The answer is probably yes. Does that mean it is good for us, personally? I don’t think so. Is it good for society? Clearly, we are seeing the cracks in this le se faire, choose your own morals approach.
The sad truth appears to be that the word “temptation” has lost its teeth and sting. Just about anything that is generally accepted as a moral wrong now has an advocacy group, so temptation can be avoided entirely by simple indoctrination. By choosing my group, and thus our moral framework, what was once a temptation to do the wrong thing is now a motivation to do what we think is right.
Modern materialism makes this too easy. Seeing someone with more creates desires, needs, and even rights to the comfort we believe others have. Freedom is no longer a shared belief to a greater end, it is a pass to maximize our selfish proclivities. We have convinced ourselves that the worst thing we could possibly be is less prosperous as the “other,” whatever and whoever that means. The pursuit of fairness has allowed us to justify our temptations to act against our collective betterment and rebrand them as justifications.
I don’t think it has to be this way, nor should it. It won’t change on a societal level, though. This change has to be within the individual. We do have the ability to choose whether to do the right or wrong thing. Rather than avoiding the responsibility that comes with the branding of temptation, we can rise above it by resisting. We can choose to take the route that is not comfortable or easy, but right; for us and the rest of society.
Most people will still choose the comfort and ease at great expense. Most people will not understand what it is like to have a backbone and a moral compass. Most people will also battle the side effects of a life misaligned with morals. They will struggle with their identity, their place, and their potential; fighting against reality. Most people will do this because everyone else is. It is the new norm. Just as with most things by the numbers, if you do what everyone else does, you can expect the same results: A life of regrets.
I, for one, am glad to have the privilege of temptation. That means that I have opportunities. I have opportunities to take risks, opportunities to fail, opportunities to learn, and opportunities to grow. I don’t always make the right choices, but just trying means that I don’t often make the worst choice. I am glad that I feel temptation, because that means my moral compass is still operating and pointing north. I am happy to feel tempted, because that means I am listening to differing opinions.
Embrace temptation, don’t eliminate it. The choice to do the right thing is your greatest duty. Humor what tempts you, so you can tell if it is tempting you to do the wrong thing or if it is your gut pointing you in the right direction. Learning the difference takes practice. Without learning how to use your moral compass, you are bound to get lost. As a general rule, jumping off bridges with your friends is a pretty bad idea.