Flexing is the game now. If you want to look rich, you can. Just rent a fancy car for the day, buy some designer clothes on eBay, and drive around the nicer parts of town. People will think you made it. Real people do this, or worse, they buy it all on credit.
It is very hard to know who is telling the truth about their wealth, how they got it, and what is under the hood. Why? Because honesty and humility don’t sell. What does? The flashy trappings of success. Who wants to hear about that person who has worked a job for twenty years, saved twenty percent of every paycheck, and kept their lifestyle affordable? Probably not enough to warrant an affiliate program.
So if we can’t trust anyone to give us the honest truth about their success, why do we ask them how they did it and expect them to give us a roadmap for it? The answer, the dream of easy money. Because if they can do it, we can too. We deserve the finer things in life after all. We are special. At least that is what our parents and Mr. Rogers said. There is nothing sexy about having a car that works and doesn’t break the bank, a house that we can easily afford but needs a little work, or clothes that fit our actual lifestyle. No one will buy that if the mansion and Mercedes are in view. The luxurious life is much more exciting, especially if you add some financial drama to it.
Let’s contrast this for a moment. Think about someone that you have known for a long time, who you saw slowly rise out of poverty, who doesn’t have anything too fancy, but always seems to have things together. The kind of person that makes you think, “that person maxes out their 401K every year.” Do you ask them what they are doing financially? Probably not. Their lifestyle isn’t flashy; they likely enjoy nights in or a walk over a fancy meal. They aren’t the ones you call when you want to have a good time. They are those friends who drift into obscurity in your friends list. They don’t have that success itch, so they aren’t the ones you turn to when yours need scratching.
Let me remind you of a few facts. Median Individual Income in the US is $42,000. Roughly 18% of Americans make more than $100,000 per year. Around 7% of people own a business, and the average income of a small business owner is estimated to be $100,000 as well. Furthermore, more than half of small businesses fail in the first few years. I am not sold on this idea that hustle and entrepreneurship are as cool in reality as we build them up to be. The longer hours, increased insecurity, and overall stress aren’t winning me over.
This is exactly why, when an influencer, addressing some generic question about how to do anything, drifts into work harder, start your own business, or “just do what I did,” I have to roll my eyes at the snake oil that they are about to start peddling. It is because they are pitching people a big gamble. They don’t have advertisements on roulette wheels for a reason. The fact that they achieved success (if they even did at all) was more luck or exploitation of some unique talent of theirs rather than a foolproof strategy. The strategy simply doesn’t transfer, and even if it did, that would oversaturate and devalue the market with something we could probably do without.
So, what is your boring friend doing while you are trying out your fast track to wealth? Working and growing in their stable, boring job, budgeting, saving, planning, and trying to find small pleasures to enjoy the life they are building. They are likely investing in deeper and more meaningful relationships, not focused on spending money and being popular. They are embracing hobbies and reading for enjoyment instead of the latest business trends. They are living life, taking small steps forward, but rarely back. They know they could probably make more money, but know there will be tradeoffs that make the extra cash not worth it. They are content.
So why would you not ask this person for advice? They were able to find contentment and some semblance of balance. The supposedly wealthy person is likely stretched thin, overworked, and stressed, and still needs more. Maybe it is their investors, their employees, or even their obsessive drive that pushes them to keep trying to achieve more success, but there isn’t an off-ramp to be found, and even if they took it, they would have to come to terms with all they gave up to achieve their success.
Furthermore, the wealthy person can no longer relate to your problems. Maybe they could at one point, but having money changes you in ways that make it hard to imagine a life where you can’t afford what you need, much less want. Your measly earnings are not something a rich person can realistically relate to. Their habits and strategies all operate on a higher level now. They can’t honestly tell you how to invest $1,000, because everything they invest in is $100,000 or more. A 20% payoff isn’t what they are seeking; it’s 10X or bust.
There is some utility in thinking on this larger scale. It can get you out of the minutiae of day-to-day tasks and force you to see a bigger picture. It can separate the emotion of your ambitions for success from the urgency of the grocery bill. Focusing on your immediate needs when you are struggling has a way of clouding your judgment when it comes to long-term thinking. To say that if you are worried about coming up with the money for rent, investing, or starting a business feels as impractical as buying a lottery ticket and winning feels like the same odds.
The truth is that the rich and the poor speak two different financial languages. Too often, what each said cannot be interpreted by the other. That leaves us with those in the middle, the lesser wealthy, the influencers, the grifters. People who got wealthy simply by convincing people they were wealthy and promising the secret for a trivial amount of money.
If you listen to Warren Buffett, someone who is actually rich and takes questions every now and then, he offers little inspiration. He and his business partners will tell you things like, “The first $100k is a bitch.” They know it isn’t easy, there aren’t shortcuts, and they know they got lucky to some extent. They also know that the majority of people aren’t like them. They don’t possess the motivation, temperament, or willingness to sacrifice like they did to obtain the same results.
On the other end of the rich influencers, you have the Dave Ramsey types. The kind that have the qualifications of hitting rock bottom after making bad financial decisions and climbing their way back to wealth. In the same way sinners are saved by religions of old, they are saved by outdated financial principles. They can absolutely work, but offer no flexibility, nuance, or satisfaction in the journey, just a modest outcome. What this financial piety hides is the fact that they simply tried the same tactics and got better results after learning a little from their failures. Taking the same risk multiple times and getting lucky eventually is not a guide to success. While they no longer have a connection to your situation, unlike the Buffetts of the world, the Ramseys will try to convince you they have much in common with you, and if they can do it, so can you.
These influencers that we consume their content, buy their courses, and follow their advice are not selling solutions; they are selling entertainment in the form of dreams. The truth is that, deep down, we know what will help us on our financial journey; we just want the shortcut, the template. When we think about trying to improve our financial situation, we know it starts with saving and working a little harder, but we don’t want to do that. It is hard and it is not fast. Living below our means isn’t glamorous, fun, or comfortable, and at times, it feels like it undermines the hard work we do to generate any money at all. That validation scratches the itch of feeling like there is a shortcut. It generates the buzz of the lottery. Hearing rags-to-riches stories in one short sitting makes it feel like the journey is fast and clear. It isn’t.
These supposed rich people do not hold the secrets to moving from the lower class to the middle class. They don’t have the answers to career success. Most of the time, they can do more harm than good to your situation by offering broad and generalized advice. The chances of you picking the best single stocks, like Warren Buffett, are rare, and the numbers indicate you are more likely to lose money than have sizable gains. Having absolutely no debt, like Dave Ramsey preaches, will land you in a tough spot when you need loans, like a mortgage, due to a lack of credit history.
What can’t be overlooked is that, among the risk and the luck, getting rich rapidly requires something in almost every case. It requires the willingness to exploit. Whether that means offering low-quality, low-effort products and services at a surplus, utilizing the cheapest labor available, treating them poorly, or simply lying and cheating. None of this is sustainable; it is eventually found out, forcing the person to “create other streams of income,” which they, of course, will play off as business genius. This is because the payout is the goal, not actually creating value. The perfect place for this is the internet, where things are bout and sold without evaluation. If they had to run these operations in the light of day, they would never get off the ground. So before you think to act on such advice, ask yourself if that is how you want to make your money, by exploiting others and watering down the value in the economy further.
Traditional success, the kind that is most predictable and attainable, is fairly linear. It involves creating some value, finding the right market, and working diligently to grow consistently and profitably. Whether you are in a career or starting a business, this type of success relies on offering real value and realizing it in others. Success that is built quickly and relies on hype and narrative over substance is only about seeing as much growth as possible before the lack of value is discovered. Since there is minimal value aside from the feel-good aspects of being in on the trend, there are no long-term relationships or reason for future thinking. This is one reason that traditional success can be built with cash, and hype is done on credit. Traditional success requires being informed and somewhat frugal. What you are offering is real, so it must be managed. Keeping business in the black requires attention, talent, and forward thinking. No matter your value, that discipline changes success from luck to skill.
You shouldn’t ignore your financial education, nor stop seeking ways to meet your financial goals, but you should be careful about what you put into practice. If you want to gamble with a chance for a larger payout, go for it, but don’t put all your savings into it. If you want to live way below your means, it will serve you well, but don’t miss out on life to maintain a 40% savings rate. Have balance, patience, and plan with a predictable, positive outcome. Be your own advisor, though. You can always ask for help, but don’t let someone else dictate your goals, plans, or tactics. You need information to make good decisions, not templates. Real, attainable financial stability is achieved through discipline. Sometimes people get lucky and are happy to tell you about it. There are many more that did not get lucky, though. These stories of failure are not told because they don’t sell. People don’t buy warnings, they buy wins.
Influencers are not your friend. Rich people don’t care if you get rich too. They want your time, attention, and money to grow their wealth. Just don’t buy it.